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Making up for a week of nonposting

February 29, 2008

I’ve been preoccupied by “work” lately and have not been good about posting. (Andy is working from and still not posting; obviously I am busy, and he is lazy.)

I still see things all the time I want to write about but don’t have the time to sit down and write full blog posts about them. So here’s a recap of what you didn’t get to read this week:

1. On the radio this morning, a news story was talking about bullying in Maryland schools. A parent also expressed his concerns over “the YouTubes” [sic] that kids use online to bully each other. In theory it’s a valid point – internet bullying is bad. But the way he said it reminded me of Tracy Jordan, or George Bush:

2. If you are not already doing so, you should be reading Stuff White People Like. It is hilarious. See how many things you can relate to, or how many you can assign to a friend. An exceprt from a recent post:

#75 Threatening to Move to Canada

Often times, white people get frustrated with the state of their country. They do not like the President, or Congress, or the health care system, or the illegal status of Marijuana. Whenever they are presented with a situation that seems unreasonable to them, their first instinct is to threaten to move to Canada.

For example, if you are watching TV with white people and there is a piece on the news about that they do not agree with, they are likely to declare “ok, that’s it, I’m moving to Canada.”

Though they will never actually move to Canada, the act of declaring that they are willing to undertake the journey is very symbolic in white culture. It shows that their dedication to their lifestyle and beliefs are so strong, that they would consider packing up their entire lives and moving to a country that is only slightly similar to the one they live in now.

At a work dinner this week, I counted seven things from list in one story told by a recent Georgetown graduate. Top that.

3. Holy crap the dollar keeps getting worse. $1.51 for one Euro. When I studied abroad it hit $1.30 for the first time and everyone thought that was super high. If you had at least $10,000 lying around you didn’t know what to do with but wanted it to be slightly liquid, you could do worse than putting it in a foreign currency denominated CD. The interest plus the appreciation of the currency on the USD would make for a nice return. Unless the dollar rebounds. HAHAHAHA.

4. I finally got a DC license and tags. A warning from the DC police is a real motivator. Although Arlington is considering passing a law that fines those who move to the state and don’t change their plate $100 per year. Coming from Ohio, you would be better off just taking the fine, than paying all the VA transfer fees and increased insurance costs. Why doesn’t DC do that? I could pay the $100 and then not feel guilty about having OH plates two years after I moved out of the state.

5. DC social service workers who failed to figure out that a woman was crazy before she allegedly killed her four daughters. Mayor Fenty subsequently fired the workers. They appealed and were reinstated. Now Fenty basically said he will fire them again, and he gets the last word. The workers vowed to keep appealing his ruling. How unqualified for their job does a government worker have to be before they can get fired? If gross negligence and/or incompetence that lead to the death of four children is not enough, what is?

6. For those of you who love dogs and funny pictures of them, the creators of I Can Has Cheezburger have created a canine version, I Can Has A Hot Dog. Like most spinoffs, it is not quite as funny as the original, but they are getting there.

That is all.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Ashley permalink
    February 29, 2008 12:18 pm

    I was getting worried about you guys. Great post though to start out my weekend.

    Andy said that the author of STUFF WHITE PEOPLE LIKE must know me and use me as their muse. After reading through the site, I can’t really disagree with that.

    Post that suits me the most:

    #54 Kitchen Gadgets

    White people are under a lot of pressure to like cooking. Everything in their culture tells them that they need to have a nice kitchen and that they need to cook with organic, fresh ingredients to make delicious, complicated food.

    Though any great chef can prepare fantastic meals with a knife and a few pots, white people believe that they need a full cadre of appliances and gadgets in their kitchen in order to live up to the pressure.

    If you go into a white person’s kitchen you will find a waffle maker, a rice cooker, a steamer, a food processor, a panini press and a blender. They also have hand powered devices like flour sifters, ravioli crimpers, pizza cutters, potato ricers, and a sushi mat.

    But, in order for them to truly enter into whitedom, they need to own the holy grail of white kitchens – the kitchen aid stand mixer (right). They will match this mixer to their kitchen’s color scheme and it will make up the focal point. And much like many religious artifacts, it will remain untouched for months and even years, sitting on the counter to be admired as a testament to their lifestyle.

    Kitchen Gadgets also serve as one of the main reasons why white people get married. Look at their registry and you will find gadgets for any possible task in the kitchen. If you end up buying one of these for a white person, your card should make reference to them using a lot to make beautiful food that you hope you can eat one day. This kind of stuff goes over like gang busters.

    If you find yourself in a conversation about these things, a good way to say a little but mean a lot is to mention that you “find the consumer models to be poorly built, my friend, a chef, brings me with him to a restaurant supply shop that’s not open to the public. The stuff there is real quality, it’s where I get all of my pans.”

    If this is too big of a risk, you should just throw out a combination of these words: “le Creuset, Calphalon, All Clad, Williams Sonoma, and Sur Le Table.” White people go so nuts when they hear these words, you won’t even have to finish your sentence.

  2. March 26, 2008 12:59 pm

    I too ‘fess up to being a #54, and I love SWPL. I giggle unashamedly every time I read it.

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