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Because that bluetooth headset you wear all the time isn’t enough

December 4, 2007
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Ah, Express. Yet another pointless filler article. I feel bad for whoever has to write this shit – this one is especially ridiculous. Shop to Drop Pounds.

My favorite excerpt:

If you’re hauling some heft, though, use the bags for bicep curls while standing in line, Turner says. Toe raises and single leg balances are inconspicuous, too. When kids are tagging along, she suggests this trick: “Whenever you find a good deal, tell them, ‘We have to do 10 jumping jacks to celebrate!'”

Did the internet disappear or something? Shop online and go to the gym or whatever like you normally would. Please do not subject your kids to this or people who have to watch the horror in person.

I’m sure you can still manage to find some time to look like a complete tool in public if you’re really fiending for some humiliation.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. marino permalink
    December 5, 2007 8:59 am

    http://prayformojo.blogspot.com/2007/12/wisconsin-child-facing-deportation.html

  2. December 12, 2007 9:05 pm

    I hate to admit it but I was just carrying two huge bags of laundry downstairs to the laundromat and I caught myself doing curls with them in the elevator 😦

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