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Ladies, “Danny DeVito in a nicer suit” is available

November 7, 2007

Remember when we wrote about that crazy gold-digging lady who posted a want ad on Craigslist? Well it should surprise no one to know that she is not the only crazy person on the internet. The good folks at Freakonomics (though not Dubner or Levitt; apparently they are amassing a small army of bloggers over there) have found a similar ad, this time posted by a wealthy investment banker looking for a trophy girlfriend.

The describes himself as “Danny De Vito with a nicer suit” and gives a somewhat creepy description of the physical characteristics he is looking for in a mate. Now ladies, here comes to important part. What does this Penguin wanna-be have to offer you? Read on:

What I do have is an apartment nearby that I’m not using. And a buncha cash I’m not using. And a poker’s hand worth of platinum and gold credit cards I’m not using either. Maybe you’d like to use them instead of going to some boring, friggin’ office.

Assuming this post is legit (which is a big assumption), the Freakonomics blogger give a good economic analysis as to why this is likely not a good deal for the ladies. She argues the opportunity cost is too high, the risk in his profession is too great to guarantee the income levels promised, and my favorite part, that what the guy has to offer is subject to sharp diminishing returns:

Then, of course, there’s the matter of satisfaction derived from the money itself. Just as a beautiful woman could be described as a “depreciating asset,” so could a rent-free apartment with an unlimited shopping budget. A platinum card may thrill for a few months, but, particularly given the required trade-off of supplying sexual favors to a man who describes himself as “Danny De Vito with a nicer suit,” it’s also likely to offer diminishing returns.

Maybe this guy and the ” articulate and classy lady” looking for $500K minimum from a guy should talk…

One Comment leave one →
  1. Ashley permalink
    November 12, 2007 4:23 pm

    There is no way that ad is real. An investment banker making $500,000 a year still wouldn’t be able to afford a nice spare aparement in Manhattan. On top of that, someone that educated wouldn’t be using the words “ain’t” and “buncha” let alone call themselves a troll. Instead you probably have a group of kids from Staten Island jerking off to the pics these gold-diggers send them.

    Even in the most loving relationships, marriage still posesses some kind of business component. And no matter who you are, especially an investment banker from Manhattan, there’s no way don’t care in the slightest about the mental capacity of your partner. Regardless of how hot they may be, it’s still a poor reflection of oneself. A real investment banker wouldn’t settle for a complete dolt to take to business outings.

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